Idea Ripper // ArchiveCards: 1555 [Live] | Updated: 2026-10-14
Card #c1036IR // #c1036Synthesis

"That was the fifth time in two weeks he sent me out of our group as a replacement. He's got it in for me, and I'm tired of it."

— In our words · Source: Getting to Yes (Roger Fisher, William Ury & Bruce Patton)

[Use when]

You are sure you know why someone keeps doing the thing that bothers you.

[Why it matters]

The foreman said: "I pick Jones because he's the best. I know I can trust him." The foreman meant it as praise. Jones read it as being picked on, and called a walkout. Nobody had asked.

More from Getting to Yes

#c1013"The Soviet Union finally agreed to three inspections. The United States insisted on no less than ten. And there the talks broke down —…Two sides are dug in on competing figures and nobody has defined what the figures mean. #c1014"Sadat flew to the capital of his enemies, a disputed capital which not even the United States, Israel's best friend, had recognized.…The negotiation is stuck because the other side's image of you makes agreement unthinkable. #c1015"Terms negotiated between a major city and its Hispanic community on municipal jobs were unacceptable to the mayor — until the agreement…The other side agrees with the deal but cannot be seen agreeing with you.